I was not born a volunteer; I evolved into one. I got divorced in the mid-1990s. My children and I developed this "poor us" attitude that a friend pointed out to me. I was startled with the realization of what was happening to us. My friend suggested we volunteer with the Special Olympics to give us food for thought. The kids, ages 14, 9 and 9, were put on a ‘unified’ basketball team where their skills were combined with those of some handicapped youth. They thoroughly enjoyed the experience and there were no more "poor me" phrases heard around our house. Sometimes a hard look in the face of someone whose life is different can wake you up to what blessings you have been given. My children were blessed with the experience and we all learned a valuable lesson. I have been volunteering for things ever since and have never been happier.America is a land of volunteers. Four out of every ten of us spend an average of 3.6 hours per week helping others. Charity work ranks second on a list of group activities that result in happiness. (Only dancing ranked higher, pay attention all you husbands out there!)If you are already a volunteer or would like to be one, you need to try to make your unpaid assistance hours fulfilling for both you and the charity. Examine your motives. Yes, it’s nice to do good but what else is driving you? Do you want to meet other singles? Spend more time outdoors? Be with children (or escape them)? How about a volunteer opportunity that you and your spouse could do together? Or are you trying to teach the spirit of giving to your own kids? Think about the gifts that God has given you. You can offer up the skills you use in your workday life as a doctor, lawyer, carpenter or accountant. You can use volunteering as a way to develop a new aptitude you’d like to put on your resume. Or you can look at it as a way to take a break from your daily life by doing something completely different. Be realistic. You may do more than the national average or you may do less. Both are fine but sincerity is a must. A lot of nonprofits rely on volunteers for at least some of their labor. There is a need for you. What they don’t need are people who make commitments they can’t fulfill.Find a good fit. Once you have an idea of what you want, call your church, your local charities, nursing homes, hospitals or your community theater directly. Get on the Web and check out sites like volunteermatch.org. The goal is to find something that adds to your happiness, not one that robs you of it. I’ve never met a single person looking for more stress.There is adventure to be had in volunteering. I met the love of my life while running sound for the production of "Monkey Business" at the Worthing Dinner Theatre. Oh, and I met Doug then, too. (Just kidding!) Accept a servant’s attitude; use the gifts you were by Grace given.Close the gate on the selfishness of your time and find there is more to living.Story ideas or comments can be e-mailed to Nancy at Nancy861@msn.com or please call me at 962-3411.