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Sin taps

Subhead
Built on a Rock
By
Maggie Berndt-Dreyer, Bethlehem Lutheran Church, Hills

Next weekend I’m going to run a half marathon in Mankato.
It’s been 4 years since I ran my first half marathon, so needless to say, I had to start training from scratch.
It takes intentional training for me to be able to run a long-distance race. As I reflect back over the past few months and all of the workouts I have done, it’s pretty unbelievable to me how far I’ve come.
At the beginning, when I could barely run more than 4 miles without giving up, it was too overwhelming to think about running 13.1. The fitness gain was rather unnoticeable to me, until one day I realized I could run over 10 miles and actually felt pretty good while doing it.
I’ve learned a lot about training runs; the shorter, faster workouts train your body to metabolize lactic acid more quickly, and the long runs train your mind. A lot of long-distance running is mental.
The hardest part for me is not believing the voice that tells me I can’t do it — the voice that tells me I’m not good enough, or fast enough or strong enough. Each time I ran anyway, not listening to that voice, even if at first it was just a couple of feet past the point when I wanted to stop, the more I proved to myself that those voices are wrong.
For me, church is like marathon training. Because whether or not you ever run long distances, we all have thoughts that tell us we are not good enough, or unworthy of love or that something we’ve done is unforgiveable.
I had a professor in seminary who called these “sin tapes.” Often we don’t even realize the tapes are playing on a loop, but their soft, subtle drone can affect our relationships with ourselves and others.
When we gather for worship and hear the story of God’s great and mighty love for humanity, we are proving those voices wrong. Every time we hear about God’s forgiveness and mercy or receive Christ’s body given for us, we hear a different message that is counter to the soft, subtle drone of the sin tapes. And then, just like one day I surprised myself by being able to run 10 miles, without our noticing, the good news that we are loved rings more loudly than the sin tapes that tell us we are not worthy.
God claims you and calls you worthy of abundant life, no matter what anyone else says. You are God’s beloved, and that can take you to distances you never thought possible.

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